I want to say something about the menstrual cycle

I want to say something about the menstrual cycle to the women reading this.

Especially the ones who have been on birth control for years, silently carrying the weight of what it’s done to your mind, your body, your heart.

I want you to hear this:

You were experiencing a deep, biological disruption, and calling it “normal” because the world told you it was progress.

Hormonal birth control has been praised for giving women freedom. And in many ways, it did, freedom from unwanted pregnancy, from fear, from being at the mercy of a man’s lack of responsibility. But it came at a cost most of you were never told about. And most men still don’t understand.

When you take hormonal birth control, your body is flooded with synthetic hormones that override your natural cycle. You don’t ovulate. You don’t experience your full hormonal rhythm. You’re chemically flatlined.

Books like In the Flo by Alisa Vitti and The Fifth Vital Sign by Lisa Hendrickson-Jack lay it out clearly, your menstrual cycle isn’t just about reproduction. It’s your body’s vital language. It’s your internal compass. Each phase is meant to give you access to a different kind of wisdom, creativity, energy, rest, and truth.

The follicular phase gives you momentum and clarity. Ovulation brings radiance, communication, and magnetism. The luteal phase helps you discern and set boundaries. Menstruation asks you to rest, reflect, and renew.

That cycle is a foundational and essential part of being a woman.

But hormonal birth control silences it. It disconnects you from your own knowing. It numbs your body’s signals. Some women even experience severe depression, mood swings, disassociation, libido loss, gut issues, and (way more often) anxiety while on it. Because your body is screaming.

And if that weren’t enough, birth control also alters attraction. It can shift who you’re drawn to, who feels safe, even how your immune system relates to your partner’s genetics. There is data behind it if you think I’m making this up.

Women, clients, friends have reported and shared getting off birth control and realizing they no longer feel chemistry with their long-term partner.

So if you’ve ever felt lost in your own body, disconnected from your desire, or deeply emotionally unwell and couldn’t explain why, please know this:

You were likely reacting to something very real.

And I say all this not to shame the choice, but to honor the pain. You did what you had to do. You trusted the system. And no one told you the cost.

But there is another way. A way to reclaim your rhythm. To come home to your cycle. To learn your fertile window. To use tools like the Fertility Awareness Method, which is over 98% effective when used correctly. And most importantly, to reconnect with your body as a sacred compass again. Trust your body.

As men, we need to get more educated. We need to stop expecting women to mutilate their hormonal blueprint so we can have convenience. We need to become more responsible. More attuned. More reverent of what it actually takes to walk the path of the feminine.

Your cycle is a gift. A map. A rhythm that, when supported, honored, turns you into a force of nature, like you are meant to be.

And if you’ve never had a man say this to you, let me be the first:

I may never fully understand what it’s been like for you, but I want you to know this,

Your body is not a machine to be managed, it’s a living wisdom, and it deserves to be trusted.