When I look at my daughter, I feel like I could do anything for her
Kill a boar with my bare hands. Run 1,000 miles. Climb the tallest mountain. Stand between her and whatever evil comes her way.
It sounds cool, but in reality she doesn't really need any of that.
What she needs is for me to do my own work. To actually be present when I'm with her, not physically there while my mind is thinking about work and worries. To stop letting my ego drive the car. To look at the limiting beliefs and fears I've been carrying for decades, the ones that quietly prevent her from feeling loved by me, and deal with them.
That's the harder thing. The boar is straightforward. A clear threat, a clear response. My own psychology is not straightforward, and thus actually scarier.
The daughters that don’t feel loved by their fathers isn’t because the fathers don’t love them. It’s because their own stuff gets in the way.
She doesn't need a hero. She needs a father who knows himself well enough not to make his unresolved fear her problem.
That's the real ask.
