Have the conversation about exclusivity before you get into a relationship, not 4 months after
Most women wait. They don’t want to seem needy or push too early. So they keep seeing him, sleeping with him and building feelings, quietly hoping he’s doing the same.
Then one day they find out he’s still on the apps, still seeing someone else, and still “keeping his options open.” He’ll say he never promised anything, and technically he’s right. Nobody asked.
Here’s why you ask early.
It protects your heart. You find out what he wants before you’re too attached to hear the answer.
It shows you who he is. A man who’s ready for something serious will be relieved you asked. A man who isn’t will squirm, change the subject or get vague. Either way, you’ve learned something important.
It sets the tone. You’re a woman who knows what she wants and says it out loud. Good men find that attractive.
And if he says he’s not ready to be exclusive, you don’t have to argue or convince him. Just say, “That’s fine. Then I’ll keep dating other people too, until one of us is ready to choose.”
Then watch how that lands for him.
Some men suddenly realise they are ready. Some don’t, and you’ve just saved yourself months.
Ask the question you’re afraid to ask.
